ADHD Symptoms Women
ADHD is often associated with hyperactive boys who struggle to sit still in school – but that image doesn’t reflect how the condition shows up for everyone. For many women, ADHD can look very different. It’s often quieter, more internal, and much easier to miss.
While some women are diagnosed in childhood, many others aren’t identified until adulthood – often after years of feeling disorganised, overwhelmed, or misunderstood. They might have been labelled as daydreamers, anxious, forgetful, or overly emotional, without anyone realising that ADHD could be playing a part.
In this article, we’ll explore what ADHD symptoms can look like in women and girls, why they’re often overlooked, and how the experience may differ from men. We’ll also look at what happens when ADHD goes undiagnosed, how strengths can sit alongside challenges, and what support and treatment options are available (for more about Ritalin medication, take a look at our article Ritalin ADHD), including how Oxford CBT can help with private ADHD assessments for London, Oxford and surrounding areas.
How Do I Know if I Have ADHD as a Woman?
ADHD is underdiagnosed in women, not because it’s less common, but because it often shows up differently. Rather than being disruptive or obviously hyperactive, many women with ADHD experience internal restlessness, emotional overwhelm, or difficulty staying focused on routine tasks. These symptoms can be masked, mislabelled, or simply missed, especially when someone appears to be “coping” on the surface.
Why ADHD Often Goes Undiagnosed in Women
Girls and women tend to develop stronger masking behaviours – strategies that help them blend in, stay quiet, or appear organised even when they’re struggling internally [1]. As a result, their symptoms may not raise concerns in the same way they do for boys.
In childhood, a girl with ADHD might be described as shy, sensitive, or a perfectionist. She may spend hours on homework because she is overcompensating due to struggling to focus [2]. She might be emotional, easily distracted, or daydreamy but if she isn’t disruptive, teachers and parents may not suspect ADHD.
As she gets older, the difficulties may shift from schoolwork to managing everyday life. Juggling responsibilities, staying organised, keeping on top of time, and managing emotional ups and downs can become overwhelming. Without a diagnosis, many women are left feeling that they’re failing at things other people seem to manage with ease.
Differences Between ADHD Symptoms in Women and Men
While there’s overlap in core symptoms (inattention, impulsivity, and hyperactivity) these often show up in different ways depending on gender and life experience.
Common patterns in women include:
- Internal restlessness instead of physical hyperactivity
- Chronic disorganisation masked by perfectionism
- Emotional sensitivity or mood swings
- Struggles with self-esteem and feeling “not good enough”
- Overthinking and people-pleasing to avoid criticism
- Difficulty saying no or setting boundaries
- Fatigue or burnout from masking traits and pushing through challenges
In men, ADHD may more often involve visible hyperactivity, externalised impulsive behaviour [3], and earlier referrals for assessment due to the classroom disruption this often entails.
These differences mean that ADHD in women can be easily overlooked by teachers, GPs, therapists, and even the women themselves. Recognising these subtler signs is an important step toward getting the right support.
ADHD Symptoms in Adult Women
ADHD in adult women often flies under the radar. Rather than the loud, impulsive behaviours often associated with the condition, many women experience internal struggles – emotional overwhelm, racing thoughts, and a sense of always being one step behind.
These symptoms can be frustrating and exhausting, especially when they go unrecognised or are dismissed as anxiety, stress, or “just being disorganised.” But they’re very real and can affect everything from work and relationships to mental health and self-esteem.
High-Functioning ADHD in Females: Symptoms You Might Overlook
Some women with ADHD appear to function well on the outside. They hold down jobs, manage families, and tick off to-do lists. But behind the scenes, it can feel like a constant battle to keep up.
Signs of high-functioning ADHD in women might include:
- A mind that never switches off
- Constantly feeling overstimulated or exhausted
- Jumping between tasks and rarely finishing them
- Difficulty prioritising or managing time
- Forgetting appointments, names, or tasks
- Struggling to relax or enjoy downtime without guilt
- Strong emotional reactions that feel hard to regulate
Because these women often overcompensate by working harder or masking their difficulties, they may not realise their struggles are linked to ADHD.
ADHD in Women Checklist: Everyday Signs and Struggles
Here are some common signs women with ADHD report experiencing in their daily lives:
- Difficulty staying focused during conversations or reading
- Losing keys, phones, or important items regularly
- Trouble following through on tasks unless there’s a tight deadline
- Feeling scattered or mentally cluttered
- Getting overwhelmed by everyday responsibilities
- Forgetting simple tasks like replying to messages or paying bills
- Switching between hyperfocus and total inattention
- Feeling anxious, especially when trying to stay organised or meet expectations
This checklist isn’t a diagnostic tool, but it can be a helpful starting point for recognising patterns.
What Does Untreated ADHD Look Like in Female Adults?
When ADHD goes unrecognised and untreated, it can lead to a build-up of stress, burnout, and low self-worth. Many women with undiagnosed ADHD blame themselves for not being “better at life,” leading to a constant cycle of trying harder and feeling worse.
Common signs of untreated ADHD in women may include:
- Chronic anxiety or depression
- Poor sleep or insomnia from racing thoughts
- Overcommitment followed by burnout
- Relationship difficulties due to impulsive speech or emotional reactivity
- Trouble holding down jobs or maintaining consistent routines
- A long history of feeling “different” or misunderstood
Over time, untreated ADHD can wear away at womens’ self-confidence and increase their risk of other mental health challenges such as anxiety, eating disorders and self-harm [4]. But with the right diagnosis and support, things can change.
ADHD Symptoms in Girls
For many women, recognising ADHD in adulthood often involves looking back and noticing signs that were present in childhood, even if no one identified them at the time. Girls with ADHD often present very differently from boys, which is one reason the condition is so frequently missed in early life.
While boys are more likely to show physical hyperactivity or disruptive behaviour, girls often display quieter, more internalised symptoms that are easily overlooked or misattributed.
Some common signs of ADHD in girls include:
- Daydreaming or appearing “spaced out”
- Struggling to follow instructions or finish homework
- Being disorganised, forgetful, or frequently losing things
- Talking a lot, especially in rapid or tangential ways
- Sensitivity to criticism or rejection
- Emotional outbursts or crying easily
- Having trouble making or keeping friendships
- Being labelled as “too sensitive,” “lazy,” or “chatty” rather than struggling with attention or focus
In early adolescence, the demands of school and social life increase and so do the pressures on girls to stay organised, emotionally regulated, and socially aware. For those with undiagnosed ADHD, this can lead to rising anxiety, feelings of shame, and the early development of coping behaviours like perfectionism, avoidance, or people-pleasing.
Many adult women who are diagnosed later in life describe having a sense that something didn’t quite “fit” in childhood, but they were often told they just needed to try harder, calm down, or pay more attention. Understanding these early signs can be a powerful part of recognising your own ADHD story and seeking the support you may have missed back then.
What Are the Strengths of ADHD in Women?
While ADHD can bring challenges, it’s not all difficulty and disorder. Many women with ADHD possess unique strengths that shape how they think, connect with others, and solve problems. These strengths often go unnoticed, especially when the focus is solely on the areas where support is needed, but they can be just as important.
Some of the most commonly reported strengths in women with ADHD include:
Creativity and Original Thinking
Many women with ADHD are naturally creative, imaginative, and able to think outside the box. They might thrive in fields that value fresh ideas, quick thinking, or visual problem-solving. Whether it’s writing, design, music, or simply finding unusual solutions to everyday challenges, this kind of thinking can be a real asset.
Empathy and Emotional Intuition
Because many women with ADHD experience strong emotions and have had to navigate feeling misunderstood themselves, they often develop deep empathy. They’re able to tune into how others are feeling and can offer sincere, compassionate support, especially in friendships, parenting, or helping professions.
Resilience and Determination
Living with undiagnosed ADHD often means developing a toolkit of strategies to “just get through” life. Many women with ADHD have had to work harder than others to meet expectations, juggle responsibilities, or cope with setbacks. This can build a deep sense of resilience, resourcefulness, and emotional strength.
Hyperfocus and Passion
While ADHD can involve trouble focusing, it can also mean the opposite – intense concentration on something that really sparks interest. This hyperfocus can lead to long periods of deep work or creative flow, especially in areas that feel personally meaningful. When harnessed well, this can result in high-quality work and deep knowledge in a chosen area [5].
Recognising these strengths doesn’t take away from the challenges ADHD can bring, but it does help create a more balanced and empowering understanding. Women with ADHD are not “failing” or “broken” versions of anyone else. They are often uniquely wired individuals with valuable perspectives and talents, especially when supported in ways that work for them.
Getting a Diagnosis: Female ADHD Test and Assessment
For many women, getting an ADHD diagnosis can be a long and frustrating process. Symptoms are often mistaken for anxiety or depression [6], stress, or hormonal issues, and because many women appear to be coping on the outside, their struggles are not always taken seriously.
It’s also common for women to have developed masking behaviours from a young age. This can make it harder for professionals to spot the underlying patterns of ADHD, especially if those behaviours are internal rather than disruptive.
In the UK, getting a diagnosis through the NHS can involve long waiting times and multiple steps. Many women turn to private assessments for a faster, more detailed evaluation – often after recognising patterns in themselves or relating to a checklist like High Functioning ADHD Test.
An ADHD assessment typically includes structured interviews, questionnaires, and a review of your developmental history. The aim is to build a full picture of how your symptoms affect your day-to-day life, both now and in the past.
If you find yourself frequently overwhelmed, forgetful, emotionally drained, or struggling to stay focused despite your best efforts, it might be worth speaking to a professional. You don’t need to have all the answers to get started – just a sense that things could be easier with the right support.
Treatment for ADHD in Women
Once ADHD is recognised, there are several ways to manage symptoms and improve day-to-day life. The right treatment plan will depend on your individual needs, lifestyle, and preferences and for many women, a combination of approaches works best.
Therapy
Talking therapies such as Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) be an effective treatment option for ADHD, particularly for those who have had limited or no success with medication [7]. Therapy can also provide a space to process how undiagnosed ADHD may have shaped your life and relationships.
Medication
Some women find medication helpful in managing focus, impulsivity, and restlessness. Stimulant and non-stimulant medications are both options, typically prescribed after a full assessment and discussion of your needs. Medication isn’t for everyone, but for some, it makes a significant difference.
Lifestyle Support
Small changes in daily habits, like using visual reminders, creating structure, or setting realistic routines, can have a big impact. Support groups, ADHD coaching, and self-help resources tailored to women can also provide useful tools and a sense of community.
Treatment isn’t about “fixing” who you are, it’s about understanding how your brain works and finding strategies that make life feel more manageable. With the right support, many women experience real relief and a renewed sense of control.
How Oxford CBT Can Help
If you recognise yourself in the symptoms described above, or if you’ve spent years feeling overwhelmed, disorganised, or emotionally exhausted without knowing why, it may be time to explore whether ADHD could be part of the picture.
At Oxford CBT, we provide support for women and girls with ADHD, whether you’re seeking a diagnosis, looking for tools to manage everyday life, or simply want to understand yourself better.
Diagnosis and Assessment
We offer private ADHD assessments for both adults and children. Our clinical psychologists take the time to explore your experiences in detail, using a combination of structured interviews, questionnaires, and professional insight to provide clear, compassionate feedback.
Therapy and Practical Strategies
Our therapists work with you to build effective, tailored strategies for managing ADHD-related challenges. This might include:
- Improving organisation and time management
- Coping with emotional ups and downs
- Reducing overwhelm and burnout
- Building confidence and self-understanding
We understand how ADHD can feel different for women and how important it is to have support that reflects your lived experience.
Whether you’re just starting to ask questions or already looking for guidance, we’re here to help you move forward with clarity and confidence.
Conclusion
ADHD in women is often misunderstood, misdiagnosed, or missed entirely – not because it’s rare, but because it doesn’t always look the way people expect. It can be quiet, internal, and masked for years by hard work, perfectionism, or people-pleasing. But that doesn’t mean it’s any less real.
Recognising ADHD in yourself, or reflecting on earlier signs from childhood, can be an important step toward greater self-understanding. It can help explain long-standing challenges and open the door to meaningful support, not just for managing symptoms, but for building a life that feels more balanced, calm, and authentic.
At Oxford CBT, we’re here to help women and girls with ADHD feel seen, heard, and supported – through diagnosis, therapy, and practical tools that actually work in real life. If this article resonates with you, contact us to discuss how we can help. You don’t have to figure it out alone.
References
- Dean et al. (2017) The art of camouflage: Gender differences in the social behaviors of girls and boys with autism spectrum disorder. Autism : the international journal of research and practice. https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/27899709/
- Katie Mannion (2022) Recognizing ADHD in Women: The Issues. healthline.com. https://www.healthline.com/health/adhd/yes-adult-women-can-have-adhd
- Hinshaw et al. (2022) Annual Research Review: Attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder in girls and women: underrepresentation, longitudinal processes, and key directions. Journal of child psychology and psychiatry, and allied disciplines. https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/34231220/
- Katie Mannion (2022) Recognizing ADHD in Women: The Issues. healthline.com. https://www.healthline.com/health/adhd/yes-adult-women-can-have-adhd
- Eloise Porter (2012) What Is Hyperfocus and How Does It Affect Kids and Adults?. healthline.com. https://www.healthline.com/health/adhd/adhd-symptoms-hyperfocus
- Katie Mannion (2022) Recognizing ADHD in Women: The Issues. healthline.com. https://www.healthline.com/health/adhd/yes-adult-women-can-have-adhd
- Cole et al. (2016) CBT/DBT skills training for adults with attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD). Psychiatria Danubina. https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/27663817/
Author – Tom Murfitt
With over a decade’s experience in providing Cognitive Behavioural Therapy, Tom has worked in both the NHS and private sector to help adults and children to overcome a range of difficulties and improve their mental wellbeing. In addition to being an experienced CBT therapist, Tom is also an accredited Mindfulness teacher, providing courses locally, in businesses and schools. You can read more about us here.
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