Many of us have experienced relationships and long term relationships that have been very meaningful. We may have also experienced relationships where we wonder what has happened, how we got to a certain point and if the relationship can be brought back. Here we discuss the different signs to look for if your relationship may be at a sticking point, and how to refresh and revitalise your love.
What Are The Signs?
We may have been with our partners for a long time and be unaware of what has happened and not notice the signs that our relationship may be in trouble. Some of the key things to look for are:
– Limited or strained communication
– Frequent arguing on trivial matters
– Feel scared to speak your mind
– Restrict love and affection as punishment
– Having secrets from your spouse
– Frequent feelings that your spouse is your enemy
These signs are a lack of, or breakdown of, trust and affection in your relationship and should consider couples therapy or marriage counselling to approach and work through these issues in a safe and neutral environment.
If you simply feel like you’re losing the chemistry and intimate connection that you used to have for your partner, and you’re worried it won’t ever come back, maybe it’s time to give your love a lift.
The Facts
Long-term relationships are hard work. Life and all its chaos can easily get in the way and worrying about this is common. Love and attraction are not a steady increase on a graph, in fact, over time, they are bound to peak and dip at different times. Sometimes drifting away is situational and other times we’re just not giving it enough oomph!
Revitalising Your Relationship
There are many ways you can revitalise a relationship and it should have positive results if you’re both eager and willing. From our expert psychologists and therapists, here is some advice:
– Forgive and forget – let go of grudges. Holding onto something that your partner has done that has annoyed or upset you is not helpful to your relationship. Make sure you do discuss it and go through the issue together, but once its been dealt with, let it go
– Remember your dreams and ambitions – The 2 of you are a unit, working together toward the same goals. Have a conversation with your partner about those dreams and ambitions you shared a while back. Are the 2 of you on track to achieve what you said, how can you help each other?
– Try something new – experiencing and learning new things with a partner can bond us. Maybe take an online learning class together, or go out and do an experience that neither of you have done before,
– Treat yourselves to a makeover – Partners can feel resentful when their loved ones give up on appearances, and we don’t mean to do this, but it does happen. You can’t look your best all the time. But if you are your partner are having an evening together, take this opportunity to look your best and put in the effort for your partner.
– Set aside time to reconnect, no distractions – this is really important as we can be together but still not be paying each other any attention. It may feel strange to diary in time to sit together, but life will get in the way if you don’t.
– Get to know each other all over again – there are lots of cue cards and prompts full of questions for this very purpose! There are games online and purposefully created date nights to allow you to do this with your partner.